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(To the tune of "I Wonder What The King Is Doing Tonight?)

I wonder what the King is doing tonight?
Which populace has the King been screwing tonight?
Reporters tied to stakes, they've never burned this bright,
I wonder what the King is up to tonight?

And, Oh! The final hour
With impeachment process power
Being regally and legally prepared!
I'll tell you what the King is doing tonight,
He's scared! He's scared!

You mean that a King who wiretapped millions
Cut tax for the rich and saved them billions
Goes to his job in terror and distress?
Yes!

A chickenhawk who planned a battle
Deflected all quips without a rattle
Faces the Congress petrified with fright?
Right!

You mean that appalling yammering
That sounds like a blacksmith hammering
is the banging of the Press Secretary's knees?
Please!

I wonder what the King is wishing tonight?
He's wishing for Kennebunkport fishing tonight!
What occupies his time while Karl Rove is snide?
He's searching high and low for someplace to hide!

And, oh! the anticipation
Of a new investigation
With a Prosecutor, Special, yet to come!
I'll tell you what the King is feeling tonight:
He's dumb!
He shakes!
He quayles!
He quakes!
And that's what the King is doing... tonight!

(c) Joe Lang 2006